Mother's Day gratitude
As today is Mother’s Day, I thought it appropriate to express my gratitude. I am eternally grateful for being a mother; it is more than I could have ever dreamed of for myself. It is unconditional love, depths of fear and boundless hope, all encompassed into one role and how wonderful it all feels. I also want to acknowledge my gratitude to my Mother. I am grateful I was born; I am truly blessed with this life. It is with gratitude, I thank her for nurturing me when I was an infant, for comforting me and meeting my physical needs. Her nurturing gave me the ability for attachments I needed early on, which in turn, helped shape me as a mother for my daughter.
I am grateful and humbled by the lessons that I learned along the way; they also informed the way I wanted to mother my child. I was able to learn the importance of love, security and acceptance from the lessons I shared with my Mother. Yes, mine wasn’t an ideal childhood and the lessons were not easy, but I am grateful. My childhood and particularly my relationship with my Mother informed and developed me as a human being, as a woman. Ok, it has taken me a LONG time to get to this point and I wasn’t always grateful or even forgiving (I’m not that enlightened!). But I am proud of whom I am and my resilience and I believe part of that has to be attributed to my Mother.
Intellectually I forgave both my parents a long time ago, but it hasn’t been until recently that I have been able to truly forgive and move on emotionally with gratitude from my Mother. Although some days, I still think ‘f#ck you’, eat chocolate and indulge in some well-earned emotional masturbation (crying, whilst watching sad documentaries/movies).